Why does Handcrafted Interactive Fiction taste so good?

Because it’s genuine. It’s made with quality ingredients, the way our grandpappy taught us. It’s served in a frosty glass, just the right temperature.

And it’s enjoyed among friends.

Friends are genuine, too. Friends can disagree, friends can fight, but friends know when to stop and when to forgive. Friends celebrate their similarities and their differences, and they’re always there for each other in the end.

How did it get to be this way?

Grandpappy’s stories always turned out different every time he told them. Truth be told, we might never know for sure. But we do know a few thoughts that helped him perfect the recipe.

He always tried to make things better. Every time he thought about adding something, he asked himself: “Will this help?” If the answer was no, he didn’t put it in.

He knew you could have too much of a good thing. You don’t need two of something if one will do. And when you hunt around for something and finally find it, you should put it where you expected it to be.

He took pride in everything he did. What he was doing mattered to him, and he knew it mattered to everyone around him.

When someone had a question, he gave a thoughtful answer. When someone had a suggestion, he heard them out. And even though he always followed his own judgment in the end, everyone knew he was listening.

Is Handcrafted Interactive Fiction sold in stores?

Nope. We prefer to serve it straight from the tap.

Why? Because that’s part of the experience. Sitting at the counter, running into old friends, hearing what everyone’s up to. Being here matters – that’s why we’re here!

This place is what we make it, and everyone has a chance to pitch in. Look around, lend a hand where a hand is needed, flag us down if something isn’t right. Help us make it better for everyone.

I think my friend has had too much.

Hey, it happens. Handcrafted Interactive Fiction can pack a punch! Thanks for letting us know, and thanks for coming to us first. We’ve seen this before, we know how to handle it. We’ll take it from here, your friend will get home safe and sound, and you won’t look like the bad guy.

The menu looks different this week. What gives?

We can’t please everyone all the time, but we try to have a little something for everyone. They owe it to themselves not to ask for something they know they won’t like, and that means we owe it to them to make sure they know what they’re getting.

Sometimes that just means changing the names or listing the ingredients. Sometimes it means splitting something up so folks who only like part of it can just have that part. Other times it means combining things together so all the good stuff is in one place. At any rate, whatever you were looking for, it’s probably still around here somewhere.

What’s that quote behind the counter?

It’s from grandpappy’s favorite movie, about a couple of kids writing a history report for school. Those kids dedicated their lives to a proposition which was true in Abraham Lincoln’s time, just as it was true in their own, and both parts of their philosophy are important, now more than ever:

  • Be excellent to each other…
  • …and party on, dudes.